April 16, 2010

• It has been an interesting month, to say the least.
  Let’s start at the very beginning.
  I told you all that we were heading to Arizona  because my dad was in the hospital and not expected to make it. 
  I am sorry to say that he died on our way there.  Received the phone call from my sister near the OK/TX border.  We had the memorial service for him the day before Easter.  It truly was a blessing.  He would have been 95 in June, had Alzheimers, and had been saying for the past 4 or 5 yrs. that he was ready to go home. 
  In his sermon, the pastor said that even though he didn’t know many people anymore,  Dad always knew my sis and hubby, and Pastor.  And he always asked Pastor for communion.  Dad was a “preacher’s kid”, and he never forgot his upbringing.  I’m just sorry that I didn’t get to say good-bye. 
  The memorial service was small.  Just immediate family and a couple of older people from his church who still remembered him. 
  My sister was unable to get to the service.  She just wasn’t up to it.
  I told you that she had gallbladder surgery in early March, and that they discovered cancer.
  Turned out to be Stage 4—the worst stage.
  The surgeon gave her 1 to 5 months, but the oncologist thought 6 mos. to 1 yr.  We believed the oncologist, because besides being in some pain and weakness, she was functional.  Had to eat little bits several times a day, and took naps. 
  The two weeks we were there were very busy for her.  Drs. appts., and then she and hubby had to take a trip up to their summer home in the mountains (5 hrs. away) in order to get our mother’s ashes, so Mother and Dad could be intered together in their church’s columbarium the following Saturday.  Since she didn’t know if she would get back up to the mountains again, she had to say good-bye to a lot of dear friends up there.  It was really a tough visit for her. 
  They were up there for 4 days.  When they got back, she had appts. for an MRI and to have a port put into her chest for chemo.  Both took a lot longer than they were supposed to because of delays by Drs..
  She was just too tired to get to the memorial service.  Nobody blamed her at all.  She was also getting yellow, which one of her Drs. told her would happen.  She was scheduled to start chemo in a week or so.
  We did get to have a good bit of time together, which was great.  It was really hard keeping my composure when we said good-bye on Easter Sunday, knowing I would not see her again.  But I am so glad I had that opportunity, since I didn’t get to do so with either my mother or dad.
  We left AZ Easter Sunday evening and got back home here on Tues. evening.  I called her to let her know we arrived home, and she sounded tired, but OK.
  Her hubby, Bill, called me on Friday or Saturday about some mail that came there for my dad–wondering what to do with it.  Found out then that Natalie had been put in hospice Wednesday evening—the day after we got home—for pain management.  Bill said I could call her at the hospice.  I tried calling her, and she managed to pick up the phone, but couldn’t talk.  I could hear her breathing, though.  So, I just talked to her a bit and told her I loved her.  Then I hung up and called the hospice back, telling them that she couldn’t talk, and probably could not hang the phone back up.
  My great-niece is my “friend” on Facebook, and she said on there that she had gone to visit Nat on Tuesday of this week, and took her a frame with pics of Nat’s great-grandson.  She said Nat kept looking at it, but couldn’t really talk. 
  That night Nat died.
  If I had known it would go that quickly—just a little over a week after we left there—we would have stayed.  But everyone was figuring 6 mos. to a year.  She went downhill soooo quickly. 
  Her memorial service will be next Friday.  I will not go back.  I said my good-bye to her when we left there, and I just cannot handle another trip this soon.  I think I am still exhausted from the stress of the first trip. 
  So, I have lost the last two people of my family within a month’s time.
  I had to stop this for a little bit in order to take a call from my niece—telling me where to find Nat’s obituary online.  Will do that when I am done here.
  ——————–
  Now, on to the good part of the trip—-seeing our traveling kids.
  Jeff said that since he was little, and we would go to AZ to visit my family, he has always wanted to live in Arizona.  When they went on the road, they wanted to explore all the very southern states to see if they would prefer someplace else.  Doing signage for the golf tournaments allowed him to do so.
  After over 2 yrs. on the road they were ready to settle down.  Jeff still wanted to live in Arizona.  He had a couple months between tournaments, and wanted to see if he could find a job in either Tucson or Phoenix areas.
  When we arrived out there, they had already been to Tucson and had also spent a week in Phoenix.  The day we arrived, they were just moving from a campground on the east side of the Phoenix valley over to the west side.  We arrived at the RV park a 1/2 hr. before they did and waited for them.  We noticed a motel right across the road from the park, and that is where we were able to stay the whole time we were there—except for 3 nights when we housesat for my sister when they were up in the mtns.  It was great being with them, and getting reacquainted with our newest granddaughter, Catalina, now 18 mos..  She was such fun.  Brightened an otherwise sad trip.  And Judy and Gretta fed us almost every night.  Great food, great weather, great company!
  Jeff spent the first week looking for work.  Out of about 100 sign company listings in the phone book, he had some interest from maybe 3.  He put a lot of mileage driving around the Valley.  He was about to give up when he got a call back from one of the 3, asking him to come back for another interview.  He was hired!! 
  Then they started looking at houses.  Phoenix has been one of the hardest hit cities economically, and there are many, many repossessed homes available.  They called Wednesday and said they found a house.  It is only 3 yrs. old, 4 bdrms, 2 baths, large 2-car garage.  It is in good condition—–many people trash their houses before losing them.
  The house sold 3 yrs. ago, when it was new, for $251,000.  The kids got it for $72,600!!  It does need landscaping, but that can be done gradually.  They can move in in a month.  They had a bit of a hard time finding a place, because most developments out there have Homeowner Associations, which always prohibit RV’s on the properties.  They needed a house where they could park the bus. 
  Now, we still have a reason to take trips to Arizona!!
  ————-
  That brings you up to date. 
  I am tired, but think that is just the stress of all of this. 
  I discovered I just cannot cry easily.  When I left my sister’s house, I had a huge lump in my throat and couldn’t even talk, but I didn’t cry.  No crying at Dad’s memorial service, but that was because it was such a blessing that he finally passed.
  I wonder if it is lack of hormones after menopause?  I used to cry at the drop of a hat!
  The tears are there, just below the surface, and they will well up in my eyes, but will not flow.
  It isn’t that I don’t care, because I certainly do!
  Is it because of so many deaths in Ken’s family over the last few years that it doesn’t affect me as much?
  Or is it because I know that everyone is out of their earthly pains and are now enjoying eternity with their Savior?
  I think it is the last—-and the maturity to understand and be able to embrace it.
  It is still hard, though.

  I want to thank all of you here on Xanga and over on Facebook for all your thoughts and prayers.  Knowing so many wonderful friends and acquaintences were there for me and my family means so very, very much.
  Love you all!!!!

   

  • 7:03 pm
  • 21 Comments